Take Five
by Hyperbunbun
Summary: The HP characters are actors in their own movies! O, to be able to act out your own life story! But what happens when Draco ruins the filming, butts into Harry & Ginny's real love life, and finds out that his love for Harry isn't strictly fanfic after all
1. Interruption

Full Summary: The HP characters from the book are actors in their _own _HP movies! Ah... to be able to act out your own life story! But what happens when Draco ruins the filming, butts into Harry and Ginny's real off-the-set love life, and finds out that his own love for Harry isn't strictly fanfic after all?

**Ok, yeah, so hi guys. I've never done a HP ff before, so this is new and all, especially since I don't _exactly _like the Harry & Draco pairing. But still, I thought about working with this plot a bit to see if it could do well.**

**And right now, this story is kinda for experimental purposes, to see if readers like my sense of parody or not... laughs...  
Anyway! Please do read on, and _please please_ leave a review for me so I can improve!**

**Thank ya!  
Hyperbunbun 3**

**Oh! And please fogive my lack of knowledge for filming terminology. hehe.**

Oh... and I don't own anything.

* * *

**Take Five**

_Interruption_

-- --

--

Chaos—that's what a passerby would have seen and heard.

But amongst the creaking of metal, the swiveling of chairs, the rustling of flimsy paper, the quick footsteps of errand boys and technicians, and the volley of shouts from one person to another- was a small and peaceful area devoid of such calamity. Inside that six-foot-radius area of peace held a high chair, a plastic table with papers and miscellaneous equipment, and a fancy-looking heavy-duty camera.

Sitting on the high chair was a middle-aged man. From the perspective of any other person, he looked as if he was trying to tune out the disarray around him. But in actuality, he was perfectly aware of it all. In fact, he enjoyed it. The man took it as a sign that all were working hard and none were slacking off. So, he happily took it all in.

A few moments later, everything was set. The buzzing chaos slowly died down as everyone settled into his or her rightful positions.

A signal was made. The aforementioned man on the high chair glanced around him and nodded in an approving manner. He motioned with one hand to begin.

"'Kay, everyone! Act 2, Scene 2, Take 1…action!" A snap was heard. The cameras rolled.

--

Gentle footsteps echoed across the narrow hallway, then stopped. Harry quickly looked around. It was Ginny. Harry stiffened.

"Erm, hi Ginny."

Ginny smiled warmly. "Hi yourself, Harry."

Then there was silence. The two stared at each other, both wanting to break the awkwardness, but they had nothing to say.

Harry tried again. "Ginny…I have to tell you something. It's about…us. Like us, as in we, our, me and you, you and me, belong together, now and forever, blah blah blah…?"

She frowned at Harry's behavior. "Yeah, I know. What about it?" she started.

"Ginny, I- I can't be with you," Harry said softly.

Somewhere distant, a cheer was heard, followed by several crashes and a bang.

Harry ignored it, and so did Ginny.

"What?" asked Ginny, unable to comprehend. Her eyebrows scrunched up.

"Look, Voldemort is after me, and it's too dangerous for you to stay with me like that. Sooner or later, he's going to come after you and harm you, or worse—"

"Harry! I don't care about that, all right? Anyway, the big news about you and me haven't spread that fast yet, and I don't think of Voldemort as a type of person to stalk housewives to gather juicy gossip. So before the gossip about us reaches his shriveled ears, we can still go about like a couple for, oh, I'd say about another few months," Ginny smiled cheekily at Harry.

Another faraway noise came to their ears, this time a long groan, along with more crashes and a sharp swear.

Harry was getting impatient. "But Ginny, you're being too risky. You haven't taken into account the many Death Eaters under his command. Maybe he will think stalking is below him, so he'll order one of the female Death Eaters to do it. And maybe she'll get along perfectly with the many housewives around your neighborhood! And after a few giggles and laughs, she'll obtain all the information she needs, and report it to dear ol' Voldemort, and then he'll start stalking _you_ instead with those beady eyes."

Ginny shivered at the thought, but she didn't give up. "Yeah right, Harry. If he does start stalking me to verify our relationship, his own girlfriend won't be too happy about that, will she?"

"…He doesn't have a girlfriend."

"…How would you know? Have you been gossiping with the housewives too?"

"No! I just… know. I think I'm pretty sure he doesn't have a girlfriend, lest it be a skeleton like himself." Harry giggled girlishly.

The faraway noise was getting louder. Harry could hear incoherent talking, crashing, and clanking of what sounded like glass. His frowned again as he tried to ignore it.

"But my point, Ginny, is that it's too dangerous for you to be around me, and I think it's best that we broke up before Voldemort finds out."

Ginny pouted, "But Harry—"

_Crash! Bang!_

They both tried their best to ignore it. "But Harry, I—"

"_Ughh! Nooooo..."_

"Okay!" Harry abruptly yelled, "I can't take it anymore! What is that noise?"

A figure suddenly appeared in the prop front door and leaned on it. The flimsy door cutout couldn't withstand the weight and immediately toppled, bringing the stranger crashing to the floor with it. _"Uhh..."_

"Cut!!"

--

Everyone turned. The director, sitting a few yards away, sighed. "Cut, cut! Seriously, who is interrupting the filming??"

They all glared at the weird figure sprawled on the ground, who mumbled some more, then painstakingly got up into a standing position. In the said weirdo's left hand was a glass beer bottle, almost empty. His clothes were crinkled and a little dirty, and his slick bright blonde hair was covered in dustballs. He groaned again, rubbed his forehead with his free hand, and groggily looked up and around in curiosity. "…Huh? Y'all looking at me…?"

It was Malfoy. Draco Malfoy.

And he was drunk.

* * *

**Just to make it clearer for you, cause I might not have been clear before... Harry and the gang are asked to make a movie about themselves, kinda like a "based on a true story" thing, except not. So they're filming Harry Potter movies, except the actors are Harry and book characters, instead of Daniel Radcliffe... sorta get it? -sigh- Well, it seemed to turn out pretty well in my mind...**

**And the "Voldemort stalking housewives" part too. Hehe... It's supposed to be a parody, so I wanted the "movie" they were making to be somewhat parody-ish too. Ok. Yeah, enough talking.**

_**Please review! Any comment on this is greatly welcome!! ...Yeah, flames too...  
**_

--


	2. Beer

**Hello! **

**Okay, so this chapter is basically the same as Ch. 1, except it's the POV of Draco and what he was doing before be barged into the filming.**

**Thank you bunches to the two of you that reviewed Ch. 1: sHiNiGaMi-ArAsHi1412 and ladylumos. Their enthusiasm made up for my unenthusiasm and motivated me to finish up Chappie 2 quickly. So thanks again!**

Oh... I don't own HP.

* * *

**Take Five**

_Beer_

-- --

--

He was, like usual, taking his anger out through the intake of beer. The Stonewell Pub on the corner of Palette St., a walking distance from his trailer, always had a seat reserved for him. He went to it almost every afternoon, so the bartenders there were quite familiar with him. But this night, a newly recruited boy had come in to substitute for the usual bartender on that shift. And, he wasn't given any advance warning about the guy who now sat at the far end of the bar, quietly chugging down yet another bottle of beer.

"So ya finished another one, dude? Ya sure you don't want something else- wine, whiskey... martini?" He let out a chuckle.

The customer looked up, bored. "The usual, two bottles this time."

The new recruit frowned. That man's voice sounded vaguely familiar. He pondered on it as he fetched the beer.

When he brought out the two bottles, the bartender tried to make conversation with the mysterious customer.

"So, uh, dude... Did ya hear about the new Harry Potter movie that's coming out? I heard the good guys are finally going to kill some o' those Death Eaters, those evil freaks." He laughed.

The customer jerked his head up. He glared through his droopy bangs. "What did you say about 'those evil freaks'?" he hissed.

"Well, ya know... the creepy bad guys in the movie that are goin' after Harry. They're all freaks, like that one little dude, Draco Malfoy—"

A hand shot to his neck and grabbed a fistful of his work uniform. He almost choked.

"What," a voice whispered dangerously, "little dude you talkin' about, _dude_?"

The struggling bartender looked up into the flashing eyes of his customer. No wonder the voice sounded familiar! He gasped, "Dude! Y- you _are_ Draco Malfoy!"

--

A little while after Draco had released his pent-up anger on the beer and the poor bartender (he didn't break any bones though; Draco was still sober enough to control his energy), he stalked out of the pub and turned east- toward the movie sets and the trailers. He had grabbed several full bottles of alcohol on his way out. I'll pay for 'em tomorrow night, he told himself.

By the time he arrived at the sets, he was pretty drunk.

"That stupid bartender..." he said to himself while trudging into the front gates, "calling me a freak and a creepy bad guy... he don't know anything..."

He threw a finished bottle to the ground and popped open the last one in his hands.

"He don't know anything! He thinks I _want_ ta be a bad guy, huh? Thinks I've always wanted ta be Draco Malfoy- this arrogant freak who hates Harry Potter and his loser friends and loves his Death Eater duddy who cares more about that shriveled old Voldie guy than his own _son_! ...Aw, curse you J.K. Rowling! For making me like this! Have you ever once thought about _my feelings_?!"

Draco tried to stop hollering, but couldn't. "And then- and then these people on the web make these _fanfictions_ about me and Harry Potter getting PREGNANT!!"

At this, he felt sick to his stomach and stopped. Just then, soft voices floated to his ears. It was coming from Lot D, where they shot the Burrow scenes. They're going to do Hogsmeade scenes in the same Lot next week. But why would there be anyone in it at night? Draco stumbled to Lot D's back door and peeked into the semi-darkness.

He could hear better now. "Hi yourself, Harry." It was a girl's voice. It sounded... familiar... thought Draco, but he couldn't think straight because of the many bottles of beer he had.

"Ginny..." another voice said. Ah, it was Harry Potter, his enemy. He smiled at the thought, but he didn't know why he would smile at the name Harry Potter. Maybe he just smiled because he could still recognize someone's voice through his drunkenness? Yeah, that must be it.

And the girl, Ginny. No wonder the previous speaker sounded familiar. She was that redheaded freckle girl that Harry was obsessed with. He shuddered violently at the thought of the Weasley girl smooching Harry. His stomach felt worse than ever.

"Ginny, I- I can't be with you," Draco heard Harry say. He slowly widened one eye in surprise. It wasn't the alcohol speaking to him, right? Nevertheless, he let out a loud "Whoohoo!!" which echoed back, and jumped into the air in happiness. Shows that Ginny wench right!

But he was too drunk, and couldn't get his balance when he landed on his feet, and fell with a _CRASH_ into some props and equipment off to the side. He tried to get up quickly, and smacked in the head onto the edge of a table. Tears stinging, he brought his arms to his head, but in the process tipped the beer he still had in his left hand and spilled a good amount onto his face.

Sputtering, he growled. _Glorious_.

Giving up on trying to stand for the moment, he returned his focus on Harry and Ginny's conversation. Seriously, what were they doing here at night?

Ginny was talking: "...and I don't think of Voldemort as a type of person to stalk housewives to gather juicy gossip. So before the gossip about us reaches his shriveled ears, we can still go about like a couple for, oh, I'd say about another few months."

She sounded like she was begging. Draco rolled his eyes and groaned in exasperation. Ugh, that you-know-who girl, Ginny, he just didn't like her, though he really couldn't say why. Draco tried to get up again, but totally forgot about the table. He was greeted with a loud bang to the head and more crashes as he landed on another pile of stuff.

Clutching his head, he bit out a loud swear. He didn't care if anyone heard it or not.

Painfully, he stood up with the beer still in his hand. Subconsciously, he started walking closer to where Harry and Ginny were at, all the while muttering to himself:

"That creepy girl, always following Harry around wherever she goes... who does she think she is? Ugh, somehow all the girls Potter hangs out with are wimpy and weak. Like that Hermione wench too, that bookworm with the bushy hair... and that upperclassman Cho Chang who Harry had this huge crush on... all pathetic if you ask me... if he hangs out with their type forever, Potter's never going to get a half-decent girl, much less anything else... haha, maybe _guys_ will be a better preference for him—!"

He tripped over a cord and fell face flat on the ground, the bottle of beer also clanking to the ground, spilling out yet another amount. He stayed in the fallen position for several long seconds.

"Ughh! Nooooo..." he finally groaned, "Today is not my day..."

He painstakingly got up again. His clothes were dirty, his hair messy, and almost all of the beer was gone.

He heard someone yell in frustration, but he couldn't tell whom because the pain to his noggin was too distracting. In front of him, he saw what looked to be a doorframe. He leaned his weight on it, relieved to have some support. Unfortunately, it was only a cardboard cutout. For the umpteenth time that night, he crashed to ground.

Draco was too tired, too drunk. "Uhh…" Why did he come here in the first place...?

Then he noticed there were lights. And feet. Many feet. And quite a bit of chattering had started. How come there were so many people here?

He slowly looked up, trying to adjust to the bright surrounding. He saw Harry Potter, She-who-must-not-be-named (Ginny), and... Director Evans?!

His head hurt really badly now. So they were filming in here? He stared at the crowd again. They were staring back in a creepy way.

Draco blinked. "Huh? Y'all looking at me…?"

--

* * *

**Oh dear, we now know that Draco doesn't want to be a bad guy! Then what type of person does he want to be? (Or better, be _with_?)  
**

**Yeah, so this chappie didn't go anywhere, but no worries! In the next chapter we'll be moving forward with the plot. Later on, we'll be seeing just how Draco feels about Harry, and whether he can conquer the personality traits J.K. Rowling bestowed upon him!**

**Eh... that's it!  
**

**Review please! They make me ****happy happy happy.**

**-Hyperbunbun :3**


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